Smirting: 1. Smoking and flirting at the same time. 2. A new approach by young office workers since smoking indoors was banned – many now take up smoking just so they can chat people up in windy doorways or on fire escapes.

Management by wishful thinking: 1. The erroneous belief that one’s wishes are in accordance with reality, as is so often the case when managing a company. 2. Fanciful view that everything will be alright, despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary; wing-and-a-prayer style; hit-and-hope approach; use of sticking plaster to make do and mend; laissez-faire attitude; board of directors demonstrating no rigour or competence at all.

Bench time: 1. Amount of time spent sitting on a bench, for reasons unclear. 2. Nauseating American expression for how many meetings are held with prospective customers, believing (often erroneously) that the more you talk to someone, the more likely they are to buy; despairing cry of Sales Directors throughout the USA, as in “Jeez Brad, your team are failing to generate enough quality bench time!” (see Bench, has this got)

Growth hacking: 1. Having a think about how to grow a company or brand. 2. Ridiculously pseudo-hip phrase for doing what any sane businessperson should be doing anyway ie. working out how to promote the best interests of their product or service; most likely invented by someone with a beard.